荷尔蒙过剩的一周

So, i alone, think and feel..

心动的感觉

好久没找上门了，似乎多点酸甜苦辣的人生才更加美满...心如止水的我，应该可以去作尼姑了哈哈！

Already Gone

"I dreamt of you last night."

He said with a bright smile, "I dreamt of you last night too."

I woke up with a jerk.

For a second it was all hazy.

Then the truth hit me.

He was dead.

底线

每个人都有底线。

每个人在做每件事时，心里都会有个底线。

底线，或阻止自己往危险的地带闯，或避免自己犯下愚蠢的错误。

我很清楚自己的底线，如走到底线边缘，我不会傻乎乎跨过去。

但有时候我不禁在想，底线到底是防止让我犯下错误？还是阻止我冲破自身极限？

现在，我或得做个闯底线的决定。

我真的很希望是后者，真的。

结束，是另一个旅程的开始

今天送论文去装订，还真够贵的~~~不过挺值得的啦！毕竟是自己的“处女作”^_^

两个月来，房间第一次这么干净，连躺在地上都很舒服。空气中弥漫着干净衣服的香味，听者悦耳的交响乐，读着欧洲美术史的笔记，虽说也是为了考试与分数，但经历论文写作的磨难后，感觉背诵美术史真是陶冶性情的有趣活动^_^

大学四年，应该就这样过了，缺憾一定有，但我现在却一个都想不起来哈哈！懂得感恩且看得比较开了，我又成熟了点~~哈哈！

期待新一段旅程的开始！^_^

毕业的脚步真的近了

刚从谢师宴回来，今晚玩得非常尽兴，现在心情依旧亢奋。

很难想象，这是一个我差点没去成的晚会，所以特高兴自己最终还是出席了^_^

中文系真的能以卧虎藏龙来形容，一名同学在被朋友哄上台唱《帝女花》时，真能现场就清唱起来，而且是男女音都能唱，只能以“wow！”来形容。还有火热的肚皮舞，真的很很很“辣”！！！老师与同学的小提琴/吉他演奏，同学的手语歌以及清新的新谣等，让大家欢度了个轻松愉快的夜晚。

还有一个半月，大学生涯就结束了，而大家也将各散东西。但在那之前，让我们一起加油！！

还有，七月的毕业典礼大家一定要出席哦！

偶遇的依赖

小琬难得出城，但拖着的却是疲惫的身心。

身旁站着某个健壮高大且身上飘逸着淋浴香味的老外，仅能看到侧面，很有男人味的年轻脸庞。

公车上人越来越多、很挤，倦怠感阵阵袭来。

突然涌现奇怪的念头，不如就把他当成依靠吧！

身体遵循着潜意识的冲动，轻轻地靠向了他，惊讶的是他也靠了回来。

右肩紧靠右肩，传递着皮肤触感与体温。

就这样，两个陌生人，相互依赖着。

到站下车，掉头离开。

但脚步却慢了下来，心里希望能看他的正面一眼。

而他，并没出现。

固执的我，不愿回头。

就这样，毫秒的缘分。

背后留下了许多问号与可能。

腿上还停留着其脚毛磨蹭的感觉。

Will i be an amazing person who live an amazing life?

I've been working hard lately, no one would quite believe that i wrote my 18ooo words thesis in a week. But yeah i did, it's not a great one, still working on the details, but at least that i know i have that in me.

So i begun the waiting process again. This time is for the lecturer to return his comments and I started with things that i'd do when i'm chillin'. That is, watching tv and eating junks.

As i was pacing around in my room, watching the same old drama that i've watched for, i don't know, 5 times? Then it hit me.

I've been doing nothing, literally nothing, about my life in the past 7 months since i've returned from China. I don't read anymore. I don't go out. I just buried myself in some sort of comfort zone because i don't have to think or act, or even move. In this case, the comfort zone is my room and i'm forming an unhealthy attachment to my laptop, Hermy.

Well, in the past i would say that this is what Singapore does to you. This time, i find even this rather valid reason is fading in its trueness. The sole problem is with me, and with me alone.

But i don't know what's wrong with me. Or i should say, yes i do know what the hell is wrong with me, just that i'm too proud to admit it. Because deep down, i know there is nothing i can do about it.

People told you to dream big. So being a dreamer, i have a lot of dreams. A lot of them. However, none of them is coming true or is about to come true anytime soon. So, i felt trapped, bound inside my own veins, distasted by it, yet can't get rid of it.

So i've tried, tried to ran away from this ugly truth and persuade myself that those dreams don't exist. Telling myself it is just something that your brain does to you when you're bored. Put this thought into action and voila, i'm hiding out in a hole that i'm digging.

I woke up this morning and thought about it, long and hard. Oasis once sung "I'm start a revolution from my bed cuz you said the brains i had went to my head", i guess i know how it feels now.

And not to mention, this hiding out, is also a deja vu. I've done it before in high school and after i came back from Italy. I'm always running around in circle, mourning the lost, yet not to chase the coming fate.

That's why i get stucked. Because life goes on, and time too. If you don't move on with them, you'd find yourself caught and freezed in certain moments of your life which feels real to you, but they are unreal to life.

Somehow i think i'm being defeated by life. I don't want to be a loser. But i do feel like losing now.

表哥，安息吧！

离开

你就躺在那里，我本能地停下脚步，害怕看见眼前的真实。

深深吸了一口气，迫使自己往下看，但只能注视你三秒钟，我的泪水就溃堤。你的脸十分肿胀，有点不太像平常的你，但还算安详。一时间脑海里浮光掠影，我无法呼吸，晕眩感让我的脚步不住后退，别过头看见你母亲因为我的泪水而再度眼泛泪光，我的心真的很痛。

一个这么乖巧的儿子，这么好的人，因为医生没及时发现你正大量内出血而抢救失败。大姨说你死前眼睛睁得很大、充满不甘心，我了解，我真的了解你的感受。因为如大家所说的，两个小时前你还能说痛，但两个小时后你却必须等候死亡的降临，没有人能救得了你。我憎恨那个急诊室的医生，我憎恨那个从背后撞上你的人，但这一切的憎恨都无法再让你和我善良的三姨说上一句话、吃上一顿饭或扭转她永远失去这个儿子的命运。

我知道再多的泪水也挽回不了你的生命，但我就是无法抑制自己。